Sunday, April 6, 2014

JANUARY 2014 part2

...The research for medication was non-stop...
I found there is a drug called Artemisinin/Artemether which is successful against cancer and tumors like the one my baby Husko had...

I found there is a medicine called Riamet which has the substance Artemether.
I called the pharmacy shop/lab if they had it...they didn't.
I called the company Novartis...it wasn't readily available...
it had to be ordered through a doctors' prescription through the Greek FDA...
I lost hope...



Days & nights went by as described before...
The frustration was building...
Looking back ,during December,January and February I found myself so frustrated by everything...
The war of nerves ,constant bad mood and turmoil in my house especially between mother&father, sometimes family helping and sometimes indifferent or against me, people telling me I should just put him to sleep, lack of funds, lack of car to get to vets, 24hours a day seemed few, bad decisions ,trying to balance everything...
got me to the point were sometimes at night when Husko would wake up and needed a walk and I was dead tired or researching the internet I would just go to him and slap him......

How pathetic is this???
I slapped my sick baby...and nothing can do this right or justify it...
What kind of horrible person could do this???
WHY couldn't I hold myself together?
If you think i am a bad person you probably think better of me than i do about myself...



 This is the last photograph I have of my baby being alive...(January 19th)

 I also tried giving him BCAA for the tumor-cachexia but the suggested dose caused diarrhea so i backed it off...

By sheer chance one night ,mid/late January ,after looking at a rescue site ,I found a place where I could order Artemix (Artemisinin/Artemether/Artesunate) and a Yahoo!group experienced in this!!!

Again...high hopes emerged!!!
Few days later when I had collected the funds, I finally ordered it from the US.
It would take about 1-2 weeks to arrive and then ,my baby would have hope again!!!

***********
Ending of January......my father took Husko for a walk while I was at work!
He said Husko stumbled and hurt his left front leg (the one which had the pus come out at summer and was still opened ,due to cortisol suppressing the immune system...)...and was walking on the other 3 legs!

Returned home...found out about this...and all hell broke loose...
I cursed my father for not paying attention to Husko!!
I cursed myself for not being there or couldn't see this coming!!
Just when i hoped things would get better...this happens...
I believe it was a huge blow in my babys' psychology and already bad health and I feared it would cost him his life...

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